The Spinning of The World

I am so pleased to be able to report that The World is reviving.

A collection of islands, strategically placed in the waters off Dubai, this development can be seen from space - a bit like China's Great Wall, I understand.

 Reflecting the activity of the real thing - aka, the world, without capitals (as in not upper case, that is - obviously the real world has many capitals), The World took a serious nosedive in 2008 when no developer could see any point in proceeding, let alone any profit. Stillborn.

Now, as the world is slowly nosing itself out of the doldrums - that's if you're 'on message' - then The World is seeing its re-birth, its resurrection.

Lebanon is completely up and running. A loose collection of islands referred to as the Heart of Europe is shortly to be developed. 

So The World recovery is not sticking to the script of the world recovery in its entirety, it would seem. Where's Brazil? India? China? - the booming economies comparatively untouched by the western meltdown. Or even USA, whose government figures purport to show a fledgling recovery as long as normal rules of Economics are not applied.

The Heart of Europe development is projected to include Germany, Switzerland, The Netherlands, Sweden and St Petersburg - the latter, never to my knowledge being a country in its own right - but plenty to go at culturally, perhaps. Interesting choice of initial countries. Very steady.

Does Dubai do 'steady'? 

Glitz and glamour and self indulgence do not immediately spring to mind when considering Germany, even before The Age of Austerity and before the Germans had to pick up a vast proportion of the tab for bailing out their more glamorous, indebted partners in the EU.

Switzerland has mountains, cuckoo clocks, The Sound of Music and yodelling. Oh, and Roger Federer. Again, admirable (mostly), but not glamorous. 

The Netherlands......well, not sure whether the Dutch somewhat laissez-faire approach is a good fit with the Middle East.

And so on......

So, we're left with the culture of each country which is, of course, not to be overlooked - but it might well be here.

So. How should each island be developed? I daren't make any suggestions in this medium, but I shall amuse myself by allowing my mind to run riot.

But I do so hope The World is a success as it comes around again.

When A Facelift Just Won't Cut It

We're either get old, or we die. Or we reinvent ourselves.

 The Queen of The Netherlands - which country mystifyingly became "Holland" for handover day on Sky News - abdicated last week, handing the reins, or reign, over to her son Prince Willem-Alexander.

Queen Beatrix at the not inconsiderable age of 75 had decided that she had ruled long enough and that, presumably, her son was ready and able to succeed. Otherwise known as Prince Lager, Willem-Alexander and his family appeared as Dutch as, well, Amstel or Heineken in the TV footage. Except that his wife is not Dutch, she's Argentinian, but we won't hold that against her; a bit of breeding outside the Euro-Royal gene-pool is no bad thing.

HM Queen Elizabeth II on the other hand, at the age of 87, staunchly refuses to abdicate or, more accurately, does not perceive abdication to be an option. She is nevertheless making some concession to her advancing years, handing more responsibility over to the 'younger' Royals sic. Prince Charles, heir apparent, who is a mere sprightly 64 year old. Whether Charles will ever be ready and able to succeed in the Dutch model is not a point for discussion here, he is, however, being sent to the Commonwealth Conference later this year in the Queen's place.

And then we get to Sir Alex Ferguson whose resignation from arguably the most famous, if not actually the greatest, football club in the world, Manchester United, has sparked endless column inches and media discussion concerning his succession. I'm sure Sir Alex has had as much influence on his successor as if the latter were son-of-Ferguson himself.  The primogenitor rule. Maybe it will be the "Special One", maybe not;  certainly ManU will not be thrown a curved ball and have to retreat to the employment market - as alien to them as competing in the lower divisions.

So, the House of Orange, the House of Windsor and The Glorious Game have seamlessly managed pivotal handovers, all the while keeping their supporters on side and not hacking off the 'dis-interesteds'.

So why, after 30 years, has Kellogg's attempted to reinvent Special K, an institution all of its own? What's wrong with a discreet nip and tuck, a gradual holding-back-ageing with a larger box - maybe, more in a box - probably not? Special K specifically, and breakfast cereal as a whole, represents reliability, continuity and comfort. Who decided that barley should be added? What was wrong with the two original grains? Has a focus group indicated that the one thing holding Special K back from world domination (retail sector) has been the lack of barley?

It's like Prince Willem-Alexander showing up for his anointing in a tracksuit. Or Prince Charles greeting everyone at the Commonwealth Conference with a high-five. Or Manchester United deciding that, in view if the parlous unemployment amongst football managers, they're going to embrace jobshare and employ two managers.

On the basis that most people nowadays are accustomed to all their food being presented in red/white boxes - McDonald's, Burger King, Hardee's, KFC, PizzaLand, Wendy's - Kellogg's presumably are already doing something right. Admittedly, all those just mentioned could hardly market themselves as eat-me-for-two-meals-a-day-and-drop-a-dress-size, although I seem to remember that McDonald's tried something along those lines with their healthy salad options.

If the Royal institutions of Europe can deal with continuity, and the National Game can survive the loss of its greatest manager, surely Kellogg's could cope with Special K's reduction in popularity more sensitively.

Or axe it completely and consign everyone to a McBreakfast.

Nobody Can Have It All. So There.

"Do not trade your birthright as a Mother for some bauble of passing value....the baby you hold in your arms will grow quickly as the sunrise or the sunset of the rushing days." George H. Hinckley






A Rant at Ranting Mothers


I am oh so fed up with you whinging about how you cannot be mothers and have a career at the same time. About how employers are not understanding or flexible enough to allow you to work part-time/leave early/bunk off for children's illnesses or Sports Days or drama performances. About how your husbands/partners/fathers-of-your-offspring don't help/understand or simply would not succumb to the daily grind which is housework ('like writing a report and having it deleted daily').

Life's just like that. It is what it is.

It's a succession of choices - and presumably you mothers have been making choices all your lives, thus far? Life is the sum total of said choices at any given time.

One of the more pivotal choices is whether to have a child in the first place and when you decided to go ahead, then many sub (sic. consequent)-choices followed; shall I return to work? can I return to work? will I be able to afford a cleaner/nanny/second car?

And whilst I subscribe to the view that the government should recognise life choices, I also support the position that it's not the government's responsibility to assist families either financially or by manipulating employment law. It's a free world and a free market.

It's simple. If you can't afford to raise your children, don't have any. If you're not willing to sacrifice a career/joint income, don't have any.

If it is unacceptable to defer your own personal ambitions, and you perceive child-rearing as monotonous, repetitive drudgery, or, even worse, beneath you, then why have children at all?

Arguably raising a child in its early years is infinitely more important that practising law, medicine or any other profession. Those worlds will continue to revolve without you. Bringing up one's children should never be seen as a waste of an education.

It might be an idea to apply the supposed prodigious intellect to envisioning the sacrifices which might be required before the children are conceived. Admittedly, it's a challenge to imagine the changes that will occur after the birth of a child in detail - there are no manuals, after all - but surely it's not beyond the wit of Woman to recognise that someone is going to have to alter their lifestyle to accommodate the new dependant and that someone is frequently the mother.

Moreover, you not only blame successive governments for not facilitating your childcare, frequently it is your husbands/partners who are in the firing line.

They're variously accused of not understanding, not wanting to do the housework and, more, that they simply wouldn't do it if they were in the position of stay-at-home parents. Well, there's a thing.

But here's the thing. Who actually does want to do the housework? Men can hardly be singled out for their aversion to it. And, secondly, should you, as child-carer, not feel like doing it, then don't. Apart from the unhygienic bits (food on the floor, dirty nappies) and laundry, everything else can wait. Do those 'essentials' when the child is asleep - none of them stay awake forever. How long does it take to clear up the kitchen floor or switch on the washing machine, or both? And the ironing? Sing and clap and recite rhymes. And laugh, for God's sake. Smile.

For someone of your intellectual capacity and success, such multi-tasking should be a doddle.

And while you're giving your husbands/partners a bum-rap, do a stock-take on their lives. No career, no matter how worthy, is without the mundane, the boring bits - the same report with a few bits changed, similar clients with the same old complaints, traffic, pressure, promotion, office politics. They might enjoy what they do but that's no reason to suppose their lives are one long riot, or that you've drawn the short straw.

If you're seeking a ROI, let me tell you, there is none. Zero, zilch, nishto, nada. But if you can't devote your energies to your babies for a few years with no payback then it's a sad thing.

Diversions

Here's a list of things that I don't miss from UK.........

This was going to be the opening sentence of today's blog but before I could get stuck in to my 2000 words (ha!), daughter sent me this photo of the the most beautiful Spring day in the UK.

Which is ironic - because The Weather was going to head my list of UK pet-hates.......

So - look at this and see what you think.

There is surely no better place to be than the UK on a day like today.

We're having a sandstorm here - 36 degrees and poor visibility.


Like this;

No contest.

Miss home sometimes.

Chucked Out of Saudi for being TOO HANDSOME??

Is this the Emirati man who, allegedly, with two others was 'asked to leave' Saudi for being too handsome?

What did the Saudi authorities think might happen? That he would so excite the passions of the Saudi women that all morals would be thrown to the four winds along with their discarded abayas?

Handsome he certainly is. Rich and famous he certainly will be, if not so already.

Really Miss You Too

If my daughter is not struck down by measles or rampant hay fever, or 'flu or any other pathology running riot in the UK streets she will be starting her IB exams tomorrow - yes, the real thing is finally upon us, a cantering rearguard action come the day.

The exams started yesterday, I understand. I thought they started tomorrow - with English - but no, yesterday was the day - Politics, apparently. Hope it all went well for the Politics students - my daughter is not one of those, although Politics is part of the Uni Course for which she's applied. There is undoubtedly some incomprehensible reason why Politics is not currently on her agenda for IB although she will be taking A Level Politics in June.

But perhaps she is as confused as I, as she thinks there are no exams today - a day off for everyone? surely not - but maybe it's something obscure today like 'Atom Splitting for Beginners' - being taken by someone in Norway and someone else in Chile. Perhaps.

So, this morning she was not good. Her iMessage ran;

'Morning. Skype 3.35 your time? Really miss you. Love you. x'

I'd offered to fly over for the exams but she'd been calmer then, and logical, saying that she wouldn't really be able to spend any time with me so it would be a waste of time. Agreed.

But I should have gone anyway, shouldn't I? I should have foreseen the final countdown ending with potential meltdown and arranged a touchdown.

'Really miss you.'

Says so much.

So I called her and we didn't say that much; I was treading carefully and she was holding it together. The agenda for today is final, final, final revision for English, followed by Philosophy for which exam on Monday. She's eating because she must. She's keeping out of the way of the students with head colds/extreme breakdowns/extreme confidence. She'll catch up at lunchtime - her time. She catches her breath. So do I.

 Now I can't wait for the exams to get underway - let's get this show on the road, fast-forward two weeks to the anticlimactic, post-exams, pre-result limbo.

I can't wait to see my daughter without bags under her eyes and books in her arms and quotations on her lips.

But meanwhile,Waitrose are sending in the cavalry; no military might, just a floral bouquet with my thoughts as reinforcements on the card.

'With you every step of the way.'

As ever.  

Sky News - reality, trivia and truth

Is it ever going to stop raining? Is Summer ever going to arrive? 

Apparently not. And this is Dubai, not the UK

Sky News might like to run this as a news item - would make a change from 'the worst pollen season ever, ever, ever, since records began is going to hit the UK - millions of teenagers will be blinded by their own tears, failing their exams as a consequence....'

What????

So the 24-hour news producers at Sky run a day of complete domestic trivia whilst vilifying Dubai for imprisoning, 'torturing' and trying three Londoners for drug involvement.

This follows hot on the heels of the horse-doping scandal at the Godolphin Stables which ran and ran for days and days.

It is also a precursor to the state visit to UK of H.H. Sheikh Khalifa bin Zayed Al Nahyan, scheduled to start tomorrow. 

Apparently, the prison sentences of the 'London Three' will be on the agenda for the discussion between the UAE President and Prime Minister Cameron. Have they nothing more important to cover than that?

Maybe H.H. Sheikh Khalifa might like to counter with the behaviour, generally, of ex-pats in his country who are here solely because there is no direct taxation. That's the bottom line. They have the arrogance to dress inappropriately, drink until they can hardly stand, barf up in public - a bit like any night, in any town, on any street in the UK - but they have the arrogance to a) think they can get away with it or, b) think they can bleat about human rights when they do get caught. 

Perhaps there should be a vetting process when leaving the UK - all shorts, shaven heads, tattoos would automatically deny exit. 

Instead of chasing ex-pats for UK and all the costs that this will entail - spend the money instead on the new exit procedure. Keep all these people on UK soil and the government will have achieved revenue-collection by a different route.

Everyone's a winner.

Except Sky News, of course, whose default position is knocking Dubai/UAE and who will even clear the decks of other news to draw disproportionate attention to their stories.